I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
