i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
