y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
