i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
