My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
