I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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