the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Randomize
