You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize