Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
