Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize