Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
