the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize