This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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