belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
