i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
