fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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