K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
