i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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