i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
