a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
