one might say we're banned from that church
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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