he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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