Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
