Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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