Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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