none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize