I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
