Banned from zoo.
Again?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Randomize
