I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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