well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
