idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
