At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
