i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
