You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i barfeds in our rink
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize