omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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