I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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