So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm just crazy horny about you
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
