She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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