He kissed a someone with a penis
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
