I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
