I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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