So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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