Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
