the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
