You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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