these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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