He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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