i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You can't motorboat a personality
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
