We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I'm really busy with my period
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