dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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